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Saturday, December 29, 2012

Excitement overload! (Again!)










Monday, December 24, 2012

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas everyone! (And I'll also be politically correct and say Happy Holidays as well!)

I'll be busy for the next while with Christmas-y things, so don't expect any posts until at LEAST the 27th. Unless I find myself with excess time between now and then. ;)

With all the crazy Christmas goodies, here's to hoping numbers stay on track!

BE HAPPY ('Cause this time of year, that's the only REAL feeling.) :)

Thursday, December 20, 2012

The sweetest thing.

With Christmas spirit all around us, happiness in the air and people thinking of others, I want to share here a few things that have meant the most to me.

The first I received two years ago by way of my Grade 8 teacher (a.k.a. the best teacher I've ever had). Maybe it looks like just a paper doll, (originally it came with candy, but that's long gone) but it's so much MORE. It's the extra research she put in to find the Guiding uniform (and sure, that's a Girl Scout uniform, but still. =D), and the compliment that helped me to hold my head up high on the worst days. That little white box on the doll's hip? That [represents] my insulin pump. And that says 'BRAVE' on it. And that helped me to keep the tears behind my eyes when all they wanted to do was fall out.

So, Mme. A, I don't know if you still read this, but I haven't forgotten. Thank you. :)

And the second was given to me today, indirectly, by my little Spark buddy. (The spark buddy that I sat with for an hour at camp.)
When the other sparks leader emailed me and said there was a card left for me at the meeting place, I expected a card - maybe hand-coloured - with a signature, stuffed into an envelope. So I was pleasantly surprised when I found this:

And inside? A fancy, personal photo-card with a handwritten message that made me almost tear up:

Merry christmas [my name, spelled right :)] Giggles (that's my guiding alias)
I miss you
Love [little spark buddy]
Written in adorable little-kid writing and spelling, and so special and heartwarming. I just can't even. I want to take it everywhere with me. 
It certainly fixed my mediocre day. :)
It's almost funny how it's the smallest, seemingly most insignificant things that you plan to keep for as long as humanly possible.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

'Twas in a dark and quiet theater...

So, I went to see the Hobbit on Friday.

It was awesome. *forces self not to flail* And that's all I'll say here, 'cause as far as I know there's still some of you out there that think I'm sane. Maybe. Fingers crossed.

I discovered, while I was at this awesome movie, that diabetes can be really hard to deal with at the movie theater. It's hard to check your blood sugar because it's dark and you only have your lap, you don't know the carbs or the amount you're going to eat of the food, you have to choose the time to bolus wisely so you don't disturb anybody, you have to change all your sound setups to vibrate so they don't go off like a cellphone, and if you're low or high it makes it harder to enjoy the movie.

I found myself really jealous of my friends, just eating candy and popcorn and not mentally having to keep track of everything. They didn't have to worry about hiding their pump's light, keeping blood sugars in check with all the crazy food, and they could just sit back and enjoy THE BEST MOVIE I'VE EVER SEEN. Whoa, whoa, chill. Remember? No flails.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Pancreas jokin' and fandom flailin'.

There was a pancreas joke on the Big Bang Theory last night.

And it made me really happy, 'cause who ever jokes about pancrei? Even in REPO (the genetic opera), they never harvested a pancreas. That lonely, forgotten little organ that's actually really hard to live without.

But to hear about it on TV; 'The pancreas wants what the pancreas wants!'

Made me very happy.

There was also a trailer for the Hobbit during that show, so suffice it to say that with all this I may have flailed myself to death if I'd been alone.

Conclusion 1: It's more fun to watch TV by yourself or with understanding friends.


Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Guess what?

The post 100 actually is post 100.

There was a draft.

So the post that I thought was 100 was actually 99.


Today, my site fell out. (Yes, fell. Because it didn't really rip, it just kinda...well...fell.)
And I didn't have a spare.

So thanks, Mum, for bailing me out of that mess. :)

And that week in January, before we go back to school, that was completely empty?

Is now almost full.
Which is awesome because it's full of awesome things.

Like a Sherlock marathon with C.
And a Les Miserables viewing (!!!).
And a Wreck-it Ralph viewing with my little bro. (I LOVE that movie.)
And spending time with one of my favourite little Sparks!!! (I'm actually most excited for this one!!!)

Oh, and the gym teacher threatened to throw volleyballs at our heads today if we didn't get out of his gym. SO glad that I don't have to put up with regular gym. :)

Monday, December 10, 2012


The last post was post number 100!

I had huge plans for post 100!

Goodbye, huge plans.

Celebrate this awesome number.

Let's worship it.
Well, that's all.




November finished, and then it was like "Oh, December! Christmas! Busy! No time! Wild mind! Forgetting to post here!" My bad. I still love you all. (Except those of you who leave me almost all alone at lunch. XD).

Well, I learned many things today.

  • I read a rumour (an official rumour?) that my favourite artist is going to be working on a new album!!! Yay!!!
  • I have no one to flail with about Les Mis, but I'll flail all by myself 'cause it's going to be EPIC.
  • Presentations in English class are boring.
  • It's almost Christmas!
  • I haven't had a Netflix series running for more than two weeks.
  • Z hasn't emailed me for, like, ever. (At LEAST a week.)
  • Knowing that I'm going to get to hang out with awesome little kids make me happy.
  • Internauts are funny.
  • Applying for a song license is detailed.
  • My new 'Keep Calm and Sing Me Soft Kitty' shirt rocks.
  • Four days, 1 hour, 30 minutes.
  • *flails* *dies*

Saturday, December 1, 2012





Dudes, I got all of the following: (and I shall try not to flail or use too many !!!!s)

-A frio taco (sorry, burrito) insulin wallet; it's blue and perfect and AWESOME!
-Dan-D-Pak Rice crackers (yum)
-4 Dex-4 one-use pouches
-a (PURPLE!) dex4 keychain pouch (can never, ever have enough of these :) )
-a teeny tiny Lenny Lion (I think he's the Medtronic mascot)
-and a CDA tote that matches my camp shirt!


And there is a button on my moviemaker program that makes things RAINBOW!!! AND IT'S SO COOL!!!

And today was my first day that I didn't have to wear blue, so what colour did I end up wearing? Blue.

Friday, November 30, 2012

Tomorrow is December 1st.

Today marks the end of National Diabetes Awareness Month.

I'm going out with a bang, a diabetes shirt, and a fuzzy scarf. And tomorrow I'll be back in my usual colours and I will look back on this blue month with success in my heart. (And tomorrow we also get to think about Christmas. And the HOBBIT!!! 2 weeks!!!)

And Diabetes Awareness never really ends. It'll be there forever, until someone finds a cure. :)

Wednesday, November 28, 2012


This is late! Because I have been working on my video most of the evening (REALLY addictive)!

I learned that it's really hard to fake pulling out a site on a doorknob! Pretty near impossible!

I learned that video making is awesome, fun, and addictive!

I learned that you can make one picture be all rainbow-y by pressing one button! WHICH IS PRETTY FREAKIN' AMAZING!

I also learned today at school (learning at school - what a concept!) that some boys are actually nice and willing to work and THEY WILL DO IT WITHOUT YOU YELLING AT THEM!

And that my French/Socials teacher is awesome because she banished all the blue-eyed people to a small carpet on the floor to teach us how stupid the original Europeans were.

And that feels do not qualify as a teenage problem for the general teenage population.

I also learned today that my English teacher does not want me to conclude with this, so; That's all, folks!


Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Guess who?

Guess who has a cold now, having sparingly used a whole travel pack of tissues today and hasn't had a blood sugar below 10 since last night?

And guess who is starting to get somewhere on their video but is also kind of lost and confused and needs to enlist the help of someone *coughs -  acertainhobbitlovingawesomegirlwhoisbeggingtohelpwhichmakesmeveryhappy endcough*? :)


I'm now 17.3, which is the highest I've been in quite a while, and I don't like it. Not okay. (Although I suppose the hot chocolate and Timbits didn't help...but I bolused!)

And now I'm going to go try and figure out my video. (I'm at 11 seconds so far! Although 3 of them don't work how I want them to!)

Monday, November 26, 2012

Bored of blue.

I started my video today!

And it's be-oo-tiful! (Well, not really, but I STARTED it and I'm getting somewhere, at least XD)

Also, I am beginning to be very sick of blue. I dream in pink, purples, greens...(not really).
I bought a really pretty green shirt and a green sweater yesterday, but I can't wear them for four more days because I am NOT giving up on my promises to myself. (And I know that I haven't posted every day, as my other promise, but I tried! And it was ALMOST every day!) But I do really look forward to wearing other colours. Although diabetes awareness month is not only this month, but all year long. I will continue to spread awareness and I hope you do too - I'm just not going to do it by wearing nothing but blue.

AND I finished watching another TV series today. Which means I have very little to keep me going until December...when it all begins. *evil laugh*

Hobbit on the 14th, Les Mis on the 25th, Doctor Who on the 25th with evil snowmen and a new companion, and then there's those four weeks in two months that we get off of school...TOO MUCH TIME TO FANGIRL!

Okay. I'm okay. That's all.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Craft fair was today!

(And time ran away yesterday so I completely forgot XD)

I made $120, sold many owls, hedgehogs and teddy bears, and Lorenzo [the gentlemanly flamingo] was a  hit. A very fashionable flamingo indeed.

And I've been told that I need to dress as Alice in Wonderland next Halloween with Lorenzo as my croquet mallet. :)

I love pompom wool. It's fuzzy and thick and it's like wearing a scarf made of cloud bubbles.

I was almost offended today because one lady that came to the Craft fair came to my table, looked, talked to me a bit, then went next to my mum's table (she was manning the not-handmade-group-fundraiser knitted hats table) and said 'So, you are the producer of all those items?' No, it was me! (I did tell her that.) Just because I'm young I can't knit? Ein. It was kinda funny.

And that is all I have today. Now I can focus on other knitted things! No more owls/hedgehogs/teddy bears/ladybugs/amassing large quantities of small knitted items!

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Back in blue!

Back in blue today, with my very favourite winky neon blue smiley face shirt. (That is the best shirt I have ever bought. Most definitely.)

I made a presentation today. In a class where I don't REALLY know anybody.

And I did not die.
And actually, I'm really happy with how it went.

Right before I went on, I could actually hear my heart pounding. Completly legitly. I thought I was going to fall down.

But I was okay! And now (I think) I'll be totally cool with speaking up in class and doing presentations in the future!
(I also learned that rehearsing is the best thing you can ever do. I had basically memorised the part that I had to read, and the teacher commented on how good that was. :) )

I had a really good idea for my video's conclusion today, so I WILL finish planning and I WILL start it. Sunday maybe?

Craft fair this weekend. I'm so excited 'cause my table's going to be beautiful!

And I also got an email from my diabetic cousin who I've wanted to talk to for ages but only got contact from today. :)

AND I finished my knitted flamingo. He's huge and bowtied and tophatted and now has a face. I think his name shall be Lorenzo. Or Ralph. (Or Danny. Because Danny always wins.)

So, all in all, this has been a VERY good day.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Mountains and not noticing.

I woke up at 3.3.

Had breakfast, went to school, worked through an hour of french. And then I realized that I'd forgotten to bolus.
Having learned from past experience, I did not bolus for the carbs, but tested to correct.


Whatever, I know if I correct it it'll come down soon because it's a food high.

An hour later, 3.2.


I was actually so angry and so low that I actually stomped and punched the desk. (It was break, so only a few people looked at me. ;) )

I hate crazy mountains like this. They suck.
But I survived. Although I felt low for, like, EVER.

And I ran out of blue today. I had to wear green. But green is close to blue, and I was wearing blue jeans and a blue bag. So it's alright.

And when I told one of my friends that I ran out of blue, they said 'So? Why does it matter?' Apparently nobody has noticed that I, the one who VERY RARELY wears blue, has worn blue for a MONTH and has not been seen in pink since October! Love you guys too. XD <3

Monday, November 19, 2012

Another post of randomness!

Yesterday I was awake for 17 hours straight, only 30 minutes of which I was at home with Internet access. Therefore, no blog post. ;)

So. Today. Nothing happened.
And it's Monday, so...nufink.
I honestly don't know what to say in these blog posts. I had plans for some...but those involve pictures and uploading and honestly, I do not have the patience today/yesterday/tomorrow. I'll do it soon.

I started storyboarding and planning my video, so that's good.

I learned today that when people don't bother to differentiate between the two types of diabetes, that I don't like that. And I proceed to write in my question sheet how different they are. I need to learn to be unshy and stand up to say "No, actually..."

I am tired.
And my craft fair is this weekend! Really hope it'll be profitable! :)

I kind-of ran out of blue shirts so I had to wear a tank top. And it poured rain. All day. Winter weather, how I love you. *Sarcastic face*.

I was also rereading some of my old blog posts - looking for a poem for video ideas - there's a lot of them! And it's really funny to see how my thoughts, writing style and ideas have changed. :)

Saturday, November 17, 2012


Last night, I was almost asleep, and then I had one of those 'You know, I really should check my blood sugar' moments. It was 11:40 and I WANTED TO SLEEP - but I thought I'd check, just to be safe. (Being low in the night and not waking up to treat it is a crippling fear of mine.)

So what did my blood sugar decide to be? 3.1. (56 mg/dl).

Fine, whatever. I choke down four glucose tabs. (Those things can be hard to eat. When your throat hurts and is parched, and they're powdery, and...ugh.)

10 minutes later I check again just to make sure it's gone up.

So? 3.1. Again.

Two more tabs. I don't care, I just want to sleep.

15 minutes later I check one more time.

3.1. This is ridiculous.

Four more tabs. I'll be high later. Who cares. I will do ANYTHING in order to sleep.

At this point, it's past midnight. Gr. So, FINALLY, after 10 glucose tabs, a -30% temp basal, and annoyance, I'm 4.4. Thank goodness.

I HATE nightime lows. Especially irrational ones that refuse to budge for some strange unfathomable reason.

Sometimes this condition is REALLY hard to deal with.

Friday, November 16, 2012

Terribly sorry!

I meant to post yesterday! And earlier today! But that did not happen!

Yesterday I a) met a foreign girl whose dad makes glucometers, which is pretty cool, and b) got to sleep in class. Literally and without repercussions. (It was gym. We were doing relaxation stuff.)

I've been given some AWESOME music (thanks again, other Z!), and I am going to make a storyboard for my video...soon. Soon.

That's all. Nothing happens in my life these days.

But, I promised to keep my promise.

Another random, pointless post brought to you by me. :)

Added-later-note: Diabetic characters are ALWAYS the best. First Danny, and now Todd...but Danny wins. Danny will always win. ;)

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

WDD 2012!

It was World Diabetes Day today!
And a great big thank you to everyone who wore blue (on purpose) today!
People actually understood my diabetes shirt! Woohoo! (Not quite as awesome though as the girl in a random shop that totally understood our shirts and wanted one on the weekend!)
And I am almost out of blue shirts. Repeats start soon.
I believe I'm coming down with the accursed common November cold. Ugh, real people sick.

Thank you so much to everyone who advocates for diabetes, supports diabetes, even thinks about diabetes. Everything counts, especially this month. Diabetes will always be here, and we need people to know that. We need people to support us, to think about us, to remember us. We need people to know that we don't like this, we don't want this, but it's not a burden. It's proof that we LIVE. And along with all the needles and finger pokes and highs and lows and annoying comments, there are the people. The best people, my favourite people, who I met or came closer to through this disease. When the cure day comes, I will look back on this with fondness, if only for the people.
Love you all.
Let the blue and the awareness continue. Not just for November and National diabetes month, but forever. Although I'm not wearing blue every day forever. Man, I miss my pink.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Insulin pump on TV!

Elementary! "Flight risk"! (Elementary=American Sherlock. If you don't know what Sherlock is, you probably haven't been reading this enough. XD)

And it was funny 'cause Holmes said the guy was wearing a (random sequence of numbers) pager, but then Watson corrected him with "Actually, that's an insulin pump. The man you're looking for is diabetic."

And then I actually saw the pump! (Really, it was just like the many I've seen before.) But, it was on TV, so it was cool.

But then there's the confusing part: The man was portrayed to be, and then said to be, Type 2. And wearing an insuling pump.

I don't claim to know a lot about Type 2 - I know that the stereotypes are just that, stereotypes - but I do know that insulin pumps are quite primarily for Type 1s and that most Type 2s don't even take insulin.

So, yay on the sighting, but sigh on the confusion, I guess?

Just had to share. :)

Excited and nervous.

The JDRF Annual Youth Video Contest is up!


Now...just to figure out how to make a good video...with the theme 'My diabetes journey'...

S'all good. I have ideas. I have film. And pictures. And happiness. And enthousiasm.

Does anybody know how to get permission to use a song in a non-commercial video?

And World Diabetes Day is tomorrow! Bring on the blue! (And the diabetes shirt XD)

Monday, November 12, 2012

Awesome weekend!

So, as I've been told by many people, I haven't posted since Friday. Apologies. :)

Why did I not post when I promised to post every day, you ask?

Because I had a very busy, very awesome weekend.

With my DPB Z.

And it was SO AWESOME to see her again!

We spent the weekend shoppin', talkin', chillin', video makin', Remembrance day rememberin', and being overall happy. (Except for the Remembrance day ceremony, at which we were sombre.) (And I've decided that Gs are too formal tonight.)

It was awesome. And now I have footage for my video! (Thanks for your camera holdin' and llama dancin' and awesome craziness, Z!)

Oh, and bacon-nutella crepes are good, but I think they're an acquired taste.
And I spent this evening writing a persuasive essay and being sad because I love Sparks too much.
And I am definitely going to put diabetes on my resume. XD

Love you Z! Thanks for coming! <3

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Drunk on happiness.

Last night I completely lost track of time and stumbled upstairs before I fell asleep on my feet, so, I didn't post. My bad. :) I won't tell you what time that was, because everyone will laugh at me. XD

Been feeling a bit crazy lately...kind of drunk on happiness and with no one to express my happiness to who'll understand. Does anybody I know like talking about kids? Like, how cute and sweet and funny and wonderful and awesome to be with there are? And how happy they make me? And how I've been on Cloud 9 for the last week because all I can think about is Sparks? How one hand squeeze, one 'I like you' and one hug has kept me smiling when I really didn't want to?

Well. I'm happy. That's good. I think that working with Sparks is the best thing I've ever chosen to do.

Z WILL BE HERE IN LESS THAN 24 HOURS!!! <3 :) <3 :) <3 :) CAN'T WAIT!


Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Feeling weird.

Today was not the greatest of days. Because of stuff that I really wish never existed. (See: being a girl.)

And I had a really weird low today. Everything was a little muted, and I was kinda caught in my own brain, and my knees nearly buckled at one point...I don't know. It was weird. But it was only 3.7, which made it even weirder.

So because today was such a not-great day, I'm going to bed. Even though it's not even 8.30. Because I don't like feeling like this and I plan to feel awesome THIS WEEKEND WHEN Z WILL BE HERE!!!!!!!!!!

And I was going to go to bed without posting, but then I would have felt very guilty. So here's a post that doesn't really make much sense and doesn't have any point at all.

Going now, before I say anything else that may incriminate me. XD


Monday, November 5, 2012

What a disappointment.

So, I was just watching Bones. (For the first time in a long time - what the heck is up with your scheduling, FOX?)

For anybody that doesn't know, Bones is a anthropology murder mystery which means that there's A LOT of sciency stuff  that I have no idea what it means, and there's always a fairly gruesome murder that leads to sciency stuff.

This episode was about apples.
And at the end of the episode, Bones (main character) and Booth (her boyfriend/kind-of husband/baby's daddy - I don't even know) were enjoying applesauce. Booth said that the organic, all-natural applesauce was good even though it was 9 bucks a jar (previously having complained about the price XD) and said that "Hey, it'll keep the doctors away!"

And then Bones says "Actually, the opposite may be true. Apples contain a lot of sugar, and if you have too many you could get diabetes."

And there I was, waiting for a specification, an explanation, more sciency stuff to justify that statement.


Really, Bones? Why?!?! Not okay!

Why can't all diabetes in the media be portrayed like in Body of Proof? (Please come back soon, Body of Proof. I love you.)

Sunday, November 4, 2012

They've taught me everything and they'll never know it.

I did not post yesterday.
Because I spent my weekend at Spark camp! (For those of you that don't know, Sparks is the branch of Girl Guides of Canada for 5 and 6 year-old girls.)

It was some of the best fun I've had in a long time.

And it was also some of the best learning I've ever had.

Over the course of the weekend, I spent 38 hours with 20 girls. And I learned A LOT:

  • Having a hand to hold can make even the utterly unbearable okay
  • It's okay to want your mummy
  • Hearing a voice can change everything
  • A hug fixes everything
  • Be confident
  • Hug, smile, and love everyone and everything
  • Live the little things
  • Some people are high maintenance
  • It's okay to cry
  • There is a HUGE difference between kindergartners and first graders
  • I love being needed
  • I will put up with sitting uncomfortably for an HOUR if it'll get one little girl to be content
  • A hug and a hand squeeze from a lonely little girl is the best thing I've ever felt
  • Onesies are the CUTEST things IN THE WORLD
  • Helping someone to be strong is the best thing I've ever done.

It's only been an hour and a half and I want them back already!

And I did not wear blue yesterday. Because I was dressed as Thing 1! Which was awesome! And my hairtie was blue, so I guess it's okay.

Friday, November 2, 2012

Two hours.

That's how long my site lasted.

Two. Freakin'. Hours.
No more than that.
Couldn't it have at least gone half a day? Or AT LEAST been killed more dignifiedidly than by my hoodie sleeve?


AND THEN, because I was at school, going to gym class and in the changeroom and there were no available washroom stalls, I had to change my site in non-personal space. Dislike. AND, as I was pulling off the curvy paper that makes the adhesive wait, it broke. So then I had to scrimp everything up to pull off the paper and  now there's a crimp in my site, which is in my stomach, which is NOT where I wanted it to be. :(

And as I was going into the class because I didn't want to be late, I was loading the cartridge, etc. I sat down on the bleachers next to an...acquaintance (this is the same one who said "There are no Sparks here!" and "Why don't you have a pump?", those of you who've heard that story.) Anyway, I sat down next to her and she looked at my pump:

"What's that?"
"OHMYGOD! Is that a needle?!"
*taking it back because NO, YOU CAN'T TOUCH THAT!*
"Kind of."
"Do you have to stab it in your finger?! Oh my god!"
"Where do you put it then?! In your finger?"
"No, it clips into my cannula." *clip*
"Oh. I could never do that."
"Well, I have to."
"Yeah, but you had a choice at the start, right?"
"Well, if I want to stay alive, then GUESS WHAT I have to."

There was more to this conversation, believe it or not.
And at least I got to do my awareness bit, even though I am getting a cold and couldn't focus or care all day.

Well. At least that was partially healed by a friend (who I haven't known for very long) telling me that she would find a cure for me because she wanted to cure something. <3

So, that was my day. I'm now going to go and drink lots of tea in order to get rid of this almost-cold because it's SPARK CAMP TONIGHT!!! :)

Thursday, November 1, 2012

November: Day one.

November has begun.
Which means that as of today until November 30th, I shall not wear any pink. Or green. Or red, or yellow, or any other colour that may be in my shirt drawer. Nope, only blue.

Camp shirt and blue socks today. :)

And although the day started early and french/socials was boring, lunch was AWESOME (lots of laughter and some water thrown in - literally) and English followed suit. 18/20 and awesome comments from my teacher on my response journal!!! Woot!!!

And although I have nothing interesting to say today, just wanted to say that my goals WILL BE FULFILLED! *maniac laugh*

Here's to lots of blue, lots of awareness, and lots of blog posts! :)

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

It's Halloween tomorrow!

And I swear, if I hear one more comment of "Don't eat too much, you'll get diabetes!" then THERE WILL BE PAIN.

(Sorry for the insane lateness of this post. I was going to say 'life, you know...', but I really have no excuses.)

I'm going as Anne of Green Gables and I'm actually SUPER STOKED. Everybody cross your fingers for no rain, or at least no heavy rain?

And now, on the note of DIABETES MONTH starting in TWO days...*drumroll please*....I have more than 10 blue shirts. Which means that I shall be wearing blue EVERY day! Woohoo!
And my other goal shall be to post every day in November. I'm sure I'll have plenty to blog about, 'cause, firstly, it's diabetes month so I shall be an advocate and I shall wear blue, secondly, I get to go all-out blue on November 14th (World Diabetes Day!!!), thirdly, Bubbles shall be encased in blue 24/7, and lastly but MOST IMPORTANTLY, Z is coming to visit!!!!!!!!!!! CAN'T CONTAIN THE EXCITEMENT! *llama dances for joy*

Excuse all the caps. I'm low. And looking forward to candy tomorrow. :)

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Good days.

Last night I had an hour-and-seven-minute long skype conversation with my favourite DPB Z. It was SO awesome, although it did make me realize how much I miss camp and diabetic friendliness. <3

But it was freakin' awesome, and I look forward to doing it again. And I can't wait until we get to see each other in person (again)!

So, I'm in a rather good mood, although I have had more lows than I'd like recently, but I've got a clinic on Friday (WOOHOO!) so hopefully we'll get some stuff sorted out.
And I know that I'm going to have an AWESOME A1c! (I'm actually jittery in anticipation XD)

AND - yesterday I learned a two valuable life lessons. One is that when I'm low, sometimes, I'm hyper. And everything is HILARIOUS. And none of my friends understand this low-induced-hyperness. (Z does though - Capture the flag, man! "This is defective!")
The other, incredibly valuable, lesson is that when you clap two glucose tablets together, they sound like metal on metal. Like when you bang two quarters together? That's what it sounds like. Seriously. No joke. It was SO funny. You have NO idea. ;)

On another, still awesome, note, I'm going to enter the JDRF youth video contest this year. Can't wait! :)

Saturday, October 13, 2012

It's October 13th.

Which means that I've had diabetes for three years, today.

And I didn't even remember until ten minutes ago.

Three years doesn't seem like long, especially since I'm the 'youngest' diabetic I know. But to think how far I've come in three years, how much things have changed, how different things are now than they were three years ago...well.
I've grown, I've changed, I've dealt with numbers, needles, highs, lows, emotions, and I've had to incorporate this extra thing into my already-busy-enough life.

Diabetes has been a part of my life for three years, which seems to be a long time (even though it's really not.) I'm starting to forget life before diabetes.
I just deal with it every day, without really thinking about it or noticing it. Every day is just another day, until BAM, three years are gone.
It's always with me. Diabetes never takes a vacation, and whenever I think I can not think about it, I have to deal with a low, or a high, or a jab from the uneducated community, or a pump-contact-with-wall. It never goes away.

Sometimes I think I can't do this, and how much a cure would mean.
But then, more often, I think about how much a part of my life this is and how weird it would be to not have to deal with it. I wouldn't be who I am today without it.

It may not always be noticeable, but it's always there and it always will be. Every day. For the rest of my life.

But it's only been three years.

And I have many more to come.

You'll never bring me down, diabetes.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

I think I've gone insane...

I read this post on Animas, through SixUntilMe, (I love how direct and completely true it is), and I decided that I'm going to post the thought that's been going through my head because I am who I am and if you think I'm crazy, that's okay, because it's entirely possible. I'm putting myself out there as who I am, and I'm proud of it.

I've found out that when you leave me alone in a house for more than an hour, strange thoughts develop.

Like my balls of yarn who are developing personalities.

I just realized that some people who don't know me very well or at all are going to read this and think I'm an absolute maniac.

So, all of my teachers who I respect immensely - I'm not as crazy as this make me seem, I promise.

Y'see, the Astra balls, they stick together. The electric blue, the variegated gold and the orange, they're all buddies. They're all beautiful, soft, and kind. They're wonderful to work with and you can't help but want to hug them. The blue and the variegated are really close - they're not as much without the other. The orange is a bit of a third wheel, and he's fading, fast. But they don't mind because they all know that everyone has destinies and we all have to move on.

The Red Heart pink variegated - well, she looks nice, but when you get to know her she's quite coarse and thick. She's alright to work with, but she's not usually the first choice.

The yellow-gold smiley-face-coloured ball. He's nice and all, but he's thick and hard to get through to. Someone who will stick up for the smaller, weaker ones. He's not afraid to show his bright side, but he doesn't really like working as part of a team most of the time.

The eyelash blue looks like a sweetheart. She's fuzzy and bright, a lot like a puppy. But also like a puppy, she doesn't listen, doesn't behave, and is often quite irritating to work with.

Now, the Starlette, they're a gang. A nice gang. Everywhere you look they're there. They're happy to work with anyone, they're always bright and cheery, but they're also very hard to shake off. You get rid of one, there's an identical one right behind it, smirking at you.

Now that I'm thinking of this, maybe the Astra variegated gold is diabetic. We kind of had a bond, right from the start. I wanted to take him right into my arms and my heart, wanted to keep him forever. Maybe that's why the blue is so close to him - every diabetic has their awesome, special friend(s).
So, apparently, that's why I have so much yarn and I can't seem to get rid of it.
Diabetic wool? Really?

Sunday, October 7, 2012


I've been thinking a lot about my future recently.
I'm in Grade 10 now, so in the big picture, graduation and the real world is just around the corner.

I used to have hour-long crying sessions because I didn't want to grow up.

But now, the thought of it kind of excites me.

I love thinking about firsts. First kiss, first date, first boyfriend, first year university, first drive...

I love thinking about life on my own. Rooming with my best friend, going to university to fulfill my dream career (not really sure what yet...probably pediatric nurse), living in the big city, budgeting so I won't be broke.

I love thinking about life in the future. My wedding day, my husband, my house, my children, my career.

I love thinking about how exiting it will be. Responsibilities, freedom, love...even the thought of paying my own bills is weirdly exciting.

I didn't want to grow up.

But I think I'm ready now.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Lost and found - No longer alone.

So. Here's a story that I wrote for English. I had planned to post it right after I got it back, but that didn't turn out and when I remembered (a few days ago) I had to go find it because it wasn't in my documents. A lot of confusion came to pass that day.

Well, after a lot of wandering around lost and alone on my computer, here is my narrative essay camp story. It's about my first two camp experiences, because I wrote it before this year's camp and I wanted to do both years because I wanted the new-girl aspect but the story wasn't complete without Z. Who shall now be known as Kai. (I've change people's names because I love them and I'd really rather not encourage any creepers that I really hope aren't out there. <3) (Sorry for all the run-on sentences here. I just had cookies.)

No longer alone

I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes at the vulnerable age of twelve. I thought my life was over, thought I’d never be happy again. I felt alone, lost and confused. I didn’t think that anybody could ever possibly understand what I was going through or how I felt. I didn’t even know anybody else with diabetes. When I learned about camp, I thought that maybe I would give it a try. Maybe there would be somebody who could understand. Maybe I wasn’t alone after all.

Camp Elphinstone out on Sechelt was warm at the beginning of July. The grass was a bright and vibrant green; the water was sparkling in the sun’s happy rays. Laughter danced behind every tree, over every hill, flowing with the wind. The flag snapped joyfully in the breeze and encouraged many smile-filled interpretive dances. I wasn’t alone any more. I was surrounded by people who had diabetes, people just like me, people who had to pay attention to everything, people who really knew how I felt. For the first time in nine months, I felt free, happy, understood. I don’t really know how I learned about camp. I remember, vaguely, people talking. It was during those three days – the life-changing period of time when I learned that I had diabetes – when somebody told me there were other people like me, people who knew how I felt. And that some of them went to camp in the summer. Naturally, because of my state of denial, the fact that there was somewhere that I could have fun with this condition didn’t register until much later. When I first walked up to the massive gathering of laughing people, I felt shy and small, the characteristics that I’d always had showing themselves. But they let me in to the circle without hesitation. I started to smile with them, realising that these people were all like me. We were different, together.

Being who I am, I was still quite shy. It took somebody talking to me to get me to open up. “Hi! I’m Kai!” “I’m Kathleen. Do I know you from somewhere?” “You do look familiar… Did you come last year?” “Yep.” “Hm. How long have you had diabetes?” “A year and nine months.” “And you’re at camp already? Do you have a pump?” “Yeah – it’s an Animas.” “Cool! I’ve got a Medtronic.” The bond was instantaneous and strong.

I couldn’t help but smile all week. There were people who understood. I remember hours spent lying on our bunks, laughing until we couldn’t breathe. All the worry, all the responsibility – it didn’t go away, but it went to the back of my mind, freeing up some space for laughter.

During the week nearly everybody I met had diabetes and so we had an immediate, mutual, understanding bond. Every counselor dedicated themselves to the kids and was fun to be with. The activities we did were new things that I’d never done before – archery, kayaking and sailing are just a few examples. Everything was done with friends by my side, support from all around, and health professionals just around the corner. One of my absolute favourite things happened right after lunch. It was our cabin’s turn to clean the kitchen, and my friend and I volunteered to take out the garbage. Grabbing me by the arm, Kai yelled “We’ll take out the garbage!” We were dragging the heavy bag outside to the dumpsters when something started to get to us. To this day, we don’t know if it was hormones, heat, blood sugars or food. “To be or not to be! That is the question! Whether to suffer the slings and arrows of whatever whatever or to…” We both dissolved into giggles. The next hour was spent collapsed on our beds laughing so hard that we were literally gasping for breath. “This moment shall henceforth be known as SHAKESPEARE!”

The week was full of moments like this – random little inside jokes that doubled us over with laughter. ‘Tickle tickle’, ‘Hello Ladies’ and ‘Are your ears burnt?’ are perfect examples. It put diabetes in the backs of our minds (the doctors helping us every step of the way could worry about that), leaving us open to laughter and fun.

When the week was over – it had gone much too fast - we packed our belongings with heavy hearts, the laughter nonetheless fresh in our minds. As we boarded the bus down to the ferry terminal, we talked about the cool activities, the inside jokes, the awesomely stable blood sugars. We were getting off the bus when we met one of our friends who hadn’t known where we were. She jumped around a pole when she saw us. “Where WERE you guys? It thought you’d been eaten!” “Oh, no, we were just on the bus with the important people.” *Giggle* “I’m going to miss you guys.” “Me too.” *Hugs*.

While I was at camp I realized that I wasn’t alone. I found out that there are positives in with this dark cloud and that maybe they might even outweigh the negatives. I wasn’t alone any more, I wasn’t lost anymore. I had found a place where I could be the person I was and not the person with Diabetes.  I found a best friend that week, and it was a week that I will never, ever forget. Diabetes camp taught me that I am not alone. That nobody with diabetes is ever alone. I learned that there is a listening ear for everybody, an understanding soul. There are always silver linings even in the darkest of clouds. Diabetes isn’t who I am, and it never will be, but it is a part of me. Camp showed me that I can be okay with that. That everything can – and will – be okay.

P.S. Hey Z! We never got to take out the garbage! :)

Friday, September 28, 2012


I guess it's been a while. Sorry. Life, you know. :)

Well, that actually brings me to the semi-point. (I found out that full points never really work. Points, pfff. Let's go for random.)

Diabetes feels like it's staying out of my life.

My blood sugars have been AWESOME - I don't think I've been over 10 for, like, at least two weeks. WOOT!

My pump is staying quiet (in a good way), my sugars are behaving, it just feels like it doesn't matter any more. I don't know. I can't explain it.

Maybe it's 'cause it's three months after camp and three months seems to be the point where I start to get sad. All the time. Maybe it's 'cause clinic is soon, but still far away, mostly it's probably because I've had no diabetic contact for too long.

Anyway. It's good that it's not getting in the way, but sometimes I wish it would.

I have no idea. Just ignore this. Talking nonsense again.

On another note, we hit 1895 page views!!! That was my goal! And so I love you all!!!

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Reminders. And something that was a lot funnier when I was low.

I read this post on Six Until Me yesterday (nearly cried), and it reminded me that my own diaversary is in a month.
Three years is a lot, and I didn't even remember until someone else inadvertantly reminded me.

I guess that's good. It means it's not a part of every thought anymore. My blood sugars are awesome most days (except for waking up low seven out of eight days), and my 90 day average - which is fairly close to what my A1c will be - is getting lower every day. :)

So this year, I'll approach the date with a smile and a happy jig (because getting up at 6.30 in the morning every day is filling me with joy and energy), because diabetes isn't who I am, never will be, and I will beat this.

And on a completely unrelated note: My just-pulled-out-site really hurts and is swollen, I think.

And grape Dex4 glucose tablets are like a grape punch to the face. You know, rasberry and watermelon are like rasberry and watermelon, while orange is like oOrange and tropical punch has a bit of a punch, but grape is like GRAPE!

Monday, September 10, 2012


Was a good day.
I don't know why.

Sure, I woke up low (seems to be happening a lot lately...that's new...) and then I was low after school, but between my sugars were really good.

And I felt really, really good.
It was sunny, and most of the time not too hot, and I went on some very pleasant walks and at one point I was so happy that I just lay outside on our [concrete] driveway and absorbed the sunlight. Like a plant. Who sings.
I also felt really, really pretty today. Don't know why. New clothes? Soft hair? Awesome shoes? I don't know. But I found myself feeling pretty and not caring if anyone else thought I was pretty. I like it.

And I have a new friend, and school is going quite well, and I am getting back on track with my Sherlock blanket now that the fall fair's over (Moriarty square for the win!) and it's just one of those happy days.

I'm going to try and post no less than twice a week, but don't be surprised if that doesn't work out. But I will certainly not stop. I shall keep my promise.

Friday, September 7, 2012

Plum juice.

With school back in session, it appears I'll have less time for blogging. :)
I am going to have to get to school an hour before it starts every day for band and leadership. Which is annoying that I have to get up earlier, but then again, it's kind of cool. It should definitely bring back my morning-birdiness that I had and loved so much when I was younger.

Anyway. I'm loving school (This semester I have English, Gym, Socials and French). I've also met a bunch of students from other countries which is very cool.

Now, the actual point of this post.

Yesterday I'd had very good blood sugars, bolused for everything, kept things running very smoothly.
I got home, unpacked my lunch, and went to test my blood sugar. There'd been a plum core in my lunch which I'd picked up and thrown away. (Yes, it's relevant.)

My sugar was 16.0 (288).

This didn't make any sense at all, seeing as I'd been in the 'good' zone about an hour ago and I felt super-fine.
So I washed my hands (as I always do when I don't like the number), hoping for - but not expecting - a different number.

Test again.

5.7. (103).

Guess plums are sweeter than I thought.

And I guess I really should wash my hands before testing. (I do, most of the time. Really.)

And my sugars have been SO AWESOME recently! My 90 day average is 7.3 (131) which means my a1c will be down by a lot! Woot!!!

Monday, September 3, 2012

I have returned!

I'm back from my vacation and blog hiatus!

We went to Disneyland, San Diego, San Francisco, Santa Cruz, and a bunch of little seaside towns with names I don't remember.

And it was awesome.

I had a few diabetic encounters on this awesome journey. (As well as testing inside a tree and visiting the Jelly Belly jelly bean factory.)

I met a diabetic monkey. Yes, a diabetic monkey. Nothing more to say there. (He was in the San Diego Zoo and he really didn't care that I'm diabetic too!)

I also met another human diabetic. Well, I didn't really meet her, but I saw her. And her pink Animas Ping. In the San Francisco sourdough factory. (Good place, that. Free bread.) I whispered to my mum 'Look! She has a pump!' (My mum then proceeded to talk to the wrong person about pumps. Akward. XD) Nobody else really cared, but  it was cool. It's like 'Hey, they're really out there! It's not just me!' I love seeing diabetics in the wild, if you will. It makes me very happy.

I never know what to do, or say, so I just smiled and made my pump more obvious. ;)

Bubbles and I had lots of fun in Disneyland. He stayed disconnected on most rides, and had a -50% temp basal the rest of the time. I was still low quite a lot of the time, but it was alright. Good for my A1c, because when I wasn't low I still had awesome control. Lowest low was 2.6 (46), highest was 17 (306) (only once. I hate hot chocolate.) Other than that, I was pretty much between 4 (72) and 9 (162). It was totally and completely awesome. 90 day average of 7.2 (129) thanks to that!

Maybe it's something in the Disneyland air? Makes you happy and well-controlled blood-sugar wise?

Well, there's really too much to say in a blog post and you guys probably don't care all that much anyway. Just wanted to say that I'm back, I had an awesome time, and I am totally ready and excited for school tomorrow. (So posts might slack off a bit. Or they might increase. I don't know yet.)

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Whoops, it's been a while...

My bad. I've been busy PACKING! 'Cause I'm going to DISNEYLAND tomorrow!

So, I shall not be posting for the next three weeks. And then school starts, so no promises.
This is my first time taking diabetes to Disneyland (or any theme park), so I'm a little psyched out, but nothing could take away from the magic. :)
Bubbles and I shall have the best time ever.

And I shall test with my new tiny meter in the most outrageous place I can find! BRING ON THE CHALLENGE!

P.S. Sorry. I'm really excited. IT'S DISNEYLAND, MAN!!!

Monday, August 6, 2012

The best feeling in the world.

So, so happy.

I don't know why, but this feeling just seems to envelop me at least once a day these days.

You just want to DANCE and SING and you WON'T CARE if they LAUGH at you (in fact, you'll laugh with them) because everything's just PERFECT. The weather is sunny and NICE, your sugars are AWESOME (well, I think I might be low right now, but that's besides the point), you're not TOO TIRED - or too awake - and you just feel like NOTHING could possibly go wrong.

And your sweater's almost finished and you're just so FREAKING HAPPY.

I LOVE this. Laugh at me if you want. I don't care. I just want to SMILE and LAUGH and HUG because every day is fleeting, isn't it? Why not make the most of it?


I DEFINITELY need this key!
And I would just dance in the sun with my friends on the beach all day!

Friday, August 3, 2012


My blood sugars yesterday were not okay. NOT okay.

If I had a CGM, yesterday would have been steep mountains and deep ravines.

So, at quarter to one in the morning I was 5.7 (102). (Don't ask why I tested myself at that time, after I'd been asleep, because I have no idea. At all.)

When I woke up (at 6am), 6.4 (115). An hour later, 8.7(157).

11am - 2.9 (52)
11.15am - 5.6 (100)
12pm - 9.7 (174) (with a full bolus for lunch)
3.15pm - 21.5 (387)
4.30pm - 6.0 (108)
5.15pm - 3.1 (56)
5.30pm - 5.2 (93)
6pm - 7.3 (131)
6.30pm - 5.5 (99)
7.40pm - 7.8 (140)
9.55pm - 2.6 (46)
10.10pm - 4.6 (83)
10.20pm - 7.1 (128)
10.40pm - 8.1 (146)
11.15pm - 10.0 (180)
2.30am - 15.1 (272)

(A lot of test strips gave up their lives yesterday).

And I woke up this morning at 15.5. (279)

Some days, this makes stuff no sense. At all. And it's quite infuriating.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Kid stories.

I love kids. They can be the smartest people I know, they're fun to be around, and they're adorable, so that always helps. :)

It's what they do and what they say that are the funniest. Sometimes their statements are so deep you think you're talking to a wise owl, and sometimes they're so sincere in what seems like sarcasm that you can't help but laugh (and then, of course, you feel really guilty when they ask what you're laughing at.)

But sometimes, they just don't understand.

Like when I'm having an awesome conversation with a twelve-year-old. [Edit: Just kidding, she's only ten.] It's all fine, we're all happy, and then I say that I have to go check my blood sugar. The look that fell over her face - it's a look that I hate with a passion. It was the look of pity. 'Oh yeah, that must suck, having...that.' No, diabetes doesn't suck. (Alright, just work with me here.) What sucks is when people see me differently just because of this one little thing that is part of my life. When they feel that they have to pity me just because I have to watch what goes on in my body.

I don't like feeling different. I like it when people laugh at the Allergic to Cats on my bracelet rather than make a face that says 'I don't know what to say' at the Type 1 Diabetes that is supposedly more prominent. I like it when people ooh and ahh at the shinyness/name/awesome tunes of Bubbles rather than ask me how much it sucks to have to wear it. I like it when people don't make a big deal (or any deal at all) about the smaller things. I like it when people treat me exactly the same when they find out/remember as they treated me before.

I like being me, and I like being me without having others feeling bad for me. I'm okay with this, I've come to terms with it, so let's all be happy, 'kay?

And sometimes, the kids just don't realize that they're making my day without even trying. Like when the little boy I'm babysitting turns around, tearful, and chokes out a 'I need a cuddle' before burying his face in my shoulder. (I melted.)
Or when he's pointing out all my 'owies', and he doesn't see the poke holes on my fingers or the site scars everywhere.
That made me realize that it's not that big a deal to deal with this. It can be unnoticeable, invisible, unimportant.

A part of me, but never, ever the whole of me.

Saturday, July 28, 2012


I'm back!
From camp!

And it was so much fun!

The camp was pretty much in my backyard (well, it was only ten minutes down the road), so exploring localness was pretty awesome. I saw the underside of the bridge I've been driving over for fifteen years and saw a part of this island that I've never, ever seen before.

I made a whole new set of friends who live close enough that we can actually hang out, which is really sweet, considering until now I only knew one diabetic close enough to chill with. So guys (pointed look at all of you, especially M and K), we WILL hang out, 'kay?

The thing I love about diabetes camps is the teamwork. It's understanding the inside jokes, sharing glucose tablets (went with 54, came back with 14 while I only ate about 5), helping to judge insulin doses, and having everybody understand completely and totally, no questions asked. It's about making sure your friend is okay after being 1.9 and eating a dozen of your Dex. It's testing in a cave, shouting out carb counts, and eating strange things to bring up your sugar. It's having everyone understand how you feel when you're low and having others wish they were low so they could have your tropical fruit glucose. There's so much to love about diabetes camp, so much that if I listed it all we'd be here forever.

Thanks so much to I Challenge Diabetes and Power To Be for providing this opportunity - check them out here and here. Thanks to all the leaders who donated their time and skills to us so that we could have simple fun with less worry.

Thanks to M, M, M, M, D, K, B and O for being instant, awesome friends. I'll miss all of you and we better not lose touch. :)

Monday, July 23, 2012

Here we go again!

I'm off to camp again tomorrow.
It's local, and diabetic, and should be a lot of fun. Not to mention I'll be seeing one of my closest camp friends. :)

I shall once again have no internet, this time only for five days. So don't expect any posts for the next little while. ;)

And my camp bestie (I'm sure by now you've all heard me talk about Z - she's the one with the matching shirt) now has a blog:

She's Simply Complicated and Simply Awesome. Go check her out. :)

Thursday, July 19, 2012


Today I took the bus completely by myself. (It's exciting, okay?) I've been using the transit system more and more recently, but I've always had at least one friend with me. Today - nope.


It made me feel really independent and strong, like I could do anything, like no goals will ever be unreachable.

But then there was the awkward moment when you get on the bus alone, feeling all powerful and stuff, and you head to the back to sit - and your feet don't touch the ground.

Well, at least I got off at the right place this time.

Saturday, July 14, 2012

So much love.

I'm back from camp. I had SOO much fun, made a lot of friends, and billions of memories. And apart from some harsh sunburns which made some akward tan lines, a few mosquito bites, sore feet, a blister on my finger and some bruised fingertips (the camp lancets are harsh, man!), I'm nothing but happy.

I learned a few things while I was there. (Apart from the actual diabetes-related stuff. Psh, who needs diabetes? Oh, and insulin - what's so important about that?)

You never know true happiness until you look back and realise those weeks may have been the best of your life.

You never know true sadness until 'your blood sugar is high (23.2) and you drop your cookie on the floor.' In my case, it was when my friend was high and I dropped the last bite of my sandwich. That right there is depressing.

You never know true peace until you're sitting with your best friends listening to your favouritest story and it's the last day of camp and even though you're sad, you're ready to face normalness again.

You never know true frustration until your friends are sick and you're helpless, you can't fix it. Or until someone tries to treat diabetes as a math. Or until your pump clip breaks and your pump proceeds to hit the ground twice in the next hour and you can't get a new clip until who knows when. :(

You never know true fear until you're being told a true(ish)¸ ghost story in the very spot where it takes place and everyone around you is trembling (and dressed in black) and then you hear thumping from the [supposedly] empty attic. And then everyone bolts out of there and later it's actually really funny.

You never know true victory until you win a blood sugar competition by 0.3.

You never know true laughter until your friend spews potatoes everywhere because you're all laughing so much you can't breathe. Or until your counselor makes the funniest faces you've ever seen. Or until everyone in your cabin is low exactly when you all took measures to prevent it. Or until a dead crab comes along. 'Hello, Mr. Crab! How are you today? Dead? Oh, very good!' There was a lot of true laughter at camp.

You never know how to appreciate running water, soap and toilets until you've been without them for three days.

You never know true confusion until your counselor wakes you up, tells you it's 6:30 in the morning and then comes back from the bathroom and says 'Just kidding, it's only 5. Oops.'

You never know true friendship until you meet sixteen people who you know you could tell anything even though you've only known them for two weeks.

You never know how much everything matters until it's gone.

Everybody who ran camp - thanks for creating a second home. :)
M, J, J and W - thanks for being such awesome counselors.
Z (Shakespeare!), M (we set a place for you at dinner </3), A (awesome canoe partner), EP (loved the jam sessions), EC (you're an awesome hugger), KH (I think I'll see you soon!), KA (we missed you!), SL (stay sweet, 'kay?), KaH (I hope the trip home isn't too long!), SiP (Tiki master - the crab shall RIP), H (good job on the rubiks cube), G (remember your sunscreen), D (don't drink too much more juice), J (you photobomber, you), SP and N (You're so sassy) - thanks for being such awesome cabinmates and such unforgettable friends. Thanks for all the memories. And the warm and fuzzies. <3

I love and miss you all soooo much.

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Camp tomorrow!!!

That's all.
So I won't be posting here for the next two weeks, and when I come back it'll probably all be nonsensical inside jokes. :)


Goodbye, dear internet. I'll miss you.

Saturday, June 23, 2012


Is. In. ONE. Week.

So if I don't post on here, sorry. I'm either packing or too busy with my excitement to focus on words. :)

SOOO excited. The hockey table upstairs is covered in clothes and all that camp stuff. Fingers crossed that it all fits in the backpack.

Two weeks away from the internet...can I do it?
Who am I kidding? Of course I can do it. This is camp we're talking about.

There's the nonsensicalness again. Sorry. XD

Thursday, June 21, 2012


My shirts (well, one of them is Z's) came yesterday!!!

And they look awesome and it's super comfy and they're perect!!!

And camp is in 9 days! NINE DAYS!!!

And I went shopping today and am now clothes-ready for camp!!!

And I got some really cool shoes!!!

And exclamation marks aren't enough to express my happiness!!!

:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) : ) :) :) :) :) :) *flailflailflail*

Alright, back to life now. *Sighs* Exam tomorrow. At least it's the last one and then I'm FREEE!!!

P.S. Oh yeah, I might want to explain. My camp buddy (Z) and I got matching T-shirts for camp. I know I've put the [webiste's] picture on here before, but here it is again:

Diabetes T-Shirt

And they came yesterday. If you don't understand this [then you're probably not diabetic :)], I'll try to explain it. For me, it's putting it out there that diabetes can affect anyone and everyone and that there's no 'look' to diabetes (because people tend to assume that diabetes and obesity are directly linked. It's like saying 'I have diabetes. I dare you to tell me I don't look like I do.' Well, that's my interpretation. My mum thinks that it's linked with the phrase 'Does this shirt make me look fat?' (which it probably is), but I guess it's all open to interpretation.

Anyway, it's fun and funny and is perfectperfectPERFECT for camp. :)

Sorry for this not-completely-sensical post. I'm excited.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012


Exams coupled with blood sugars that won't budge below 10. Fun, fun, fun.

Isn't there a mathematical equation for this? Couldn't I use triangles? (I mean, they're good for everything else, apparently.) Is a 70% temp basal not enough for you?!?!?!

Saturday, June 16, 2012


It's my birthday today.

And apart from a stingy site and some rain (I have to admit, I kind of expected the rain - this is the Wet coast, after all), it's a very good day.

More than 20 birthday wishes on Facebook, sixteen days 'till camp, house full of cake smells and friends coming over in less than an hour = contentement.

And today, I'm going to have my cake and eat it too.

And I started using the Verio - more on that later.

Happy day. :)

Wednesday, June 13, 2012


School's out!

And that means that art class is over. Which means that I got all my projects back.

For now, I'll only put on the diabetes-related ones and a few that I'm really proud of.

Here we go:

Alright, I'll try to explain. Here's what I told the art teacher:

A unicorn personally represents diabetes for many reasons. The mystery around it is one; nobody really knows if unicorns exist, no one really knows how to deal with diabetes. Also, the unicorn is alone, just as I feel - one in the world of a million. The shininess of the unicorn contrasts, however, to the 'black hole' of diabetes. It's an idea that you can't quite grab hold of, can't control. An object that manipulates your way of thinking and astounds you with its terrible beauty.

The shadows represent the world. The unicorn feels out of place, alone, surrounded by darkness. The shadows are closing in on her, scaring her, not showing any love. As well as being surrounded by foreboding shadows, the unicorn is lost in the forest, confused by these apparitions, and is being closed in on, her clearing of hope shrinking smaller, smaller, smaller.

It's a little dark, but I wasn't in the best mood that day.

The next ones are photos of photos. The original ones were taken on light-sensitive paper in tin cans as well as on light platforms. The digital photos don't do them justice, just so you know.

It's been a long journey...

Through all the cool stuff...

As well as the sharp edges.

But I know that my friends...

Will ALWAYS be...

There for me.

I called the set 'Support'. Friends are important, no matter what, and none of us can afford to forget that.

And finally, something that turned out really, really well...

Is me!

Self-portrait. No, I'm not actually pink.

Yep, well, that's some of the products of my art class this year. Now, it's off to exams (and studying - well, promising that I will) and then CAMP!!!!!!

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Over - excitement.

The walk was today.
And it was fun.
And I ended up with over $2000. (Thanks, everybody, especially the Frazoo guys.)

I'm not going to lie - my favourite part of the walk is the free stuff.
Like the picnic blanket, the toque and scarf, the jumprope, the water bottle, the two new T-shirts (one of which is an I <3 Animas t-shirt which I've been wanting for ages!!!!!!!), and a VerioIQ.

I've wanted a VerioIQ since I first saw this post at SixUntilMe. I signed up for a trial - with no result - and have waited impatiently for these puppies to hit the shelves.
And today I got one, for free.
I have yet to use it, but I will. Soon. And then I will review it. Because it's gorgeous and stylish and lightyuppy and...yeah.
Of course, it only came with 10 strips, so a bit of a dilemma there. Ah well.

So much happiness.

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Walking for diabetes. Well, more like fundraising.

I always thought that it was silly, really, to call it a 'walk' when the point of it is to get money.
But whatever gets the most, I guess.

Anyway, the walk is this Sunday. That's three days. And up until yesterday, I had six hundred dollars in my fundraising account - which is awesome.

Now, I have $1253 and my team has $1303.

I am nearly in tears because I'm so happy. That much money means a lot to a lot of people.

So thank you SO MUCH, everyone, because every penny helps.

You can find my fundraising page here, if you'd like to see it.

Thankyouthankyouthankyou, everyone. :)

Sunday, June 3, 2012


I have ketones.
I haven't had ketones since I was diagnosed.

So many times I've wished that I could just be sick like a normal person - real people sick - just deal with this fever how you would normally deal with a fever. I wish I didn't have to worry about blood sugars or eating right or waking up in the night to deal with unruly sugars.
And we had to get out the book I got when I was diagnosed, the book full of words and numbers that didn't make sense then. The book that we haven't even had to think about for ages.
And on top of all this I don't really know how to deal with a fever because the last one I had was when I was seven and I had some sweet grape medecine and it was all fine. But now I'm going between being so hot that I'm sweating in normal temperature and being so cold that I'm curled up under a duvet shivering. My stomach is growling because I'm hungry but I don't want to eat. I wish that all this would just stop.

But I know that I can do this, and that it'll be over soon enough. I just have to deal with it minute by minute and I'll be okay.

Oh, and on a better note: This is my 50th post!

Sunday, May 27, 2012


I have been at camp for the weekend. Not diabetes camp (35 days!!!), but nonetheless a camp full of friends (but not diabetic ones.) Anyway, I found myself saying a few weird things, and friends ended up joining in.

One friend decided that she didn't like the word 'bolus'. Which is a pretty weird word when you think about it and/or say it more than once. So now, apparently, 'bolus' shall be known as 'insulate'. Or maybe 'inducilin'?

And juice can taste like low blood sugar. There's one particularly exotic flavour of juice (it's tropical punch or something of the sort) that I have only had once before this weekend. That time happened to be a 11pm low (one of those times when I downed the juicebox in 10 seconds flat). So I'm drinking this juicebox at lunch and say 'Hey, this juice tastes like low blood sugar.' Yeah. I didn't really bother explaining.

I got to do a bit of advocacy, and that was cool. (Explaining that no, it didn't hurt, no, I'm not used to it, no, I was fine, no, it's not a real needle, etc, etc.) But the most important thing was that I had fun, ate about six WagonWheels (Best. Junk food. Ever.), and I didn't let diabetes stop me. And I conquered my fear of canoes.

*I am really, really tired. Hence the title. :)

Thursday, May 24, 2012

It's not always the cookies.

I remember bits and pieces of when I was first diagnosed.
Never the whole story all at once, just little random tidbits that don't make sense without context. Like milk with a straw, the nice nurse, and the teddy's fuzzy head.
And the cookies.
My first blood test was in the morning, before school. As said in my stories (here and here), I wasn't taken to the hospital until late at night. I rember the first fingerpoke - the one they took just to make sure I had diabetes like they thought. (It hurt. Darn monstrous hospital machines.) The result was 26 (468), much higher from the 15 (270) of the morning. I remember insisting that it was only that high because I'd had two Girl Guide cookies after school and that I was fine, nothing was wrong. That I could go home, that it was all a mistake.
(Of course, then they tried to explain to me that it was because of diabetes, not the cookies. I didn't believe it for a while.)

Sometimes I have to tell myself that it is because of diabetes, not because of something I did. "I'm low? Must have overbolused." "High? Must have misjudged." No. Sometimes it's just random and there's nothing I can do.
On the contrary, sometimes it is something I did. Maybe I did overbolus, forget to bolus, guess instead of read the carb count.

But no matter what made it happen, I just have to deal with it. And I'm okay with that.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012


Last week - Diabetes Blog Week - was fun.

I've never really written from such specific prompts. It was really neat to see what I could come up with.

But now? I have nothing to say. I can't think of a single interesting thing.

Bubbles (pump) is no longer completely bright and shiny. I guess wearing him on the pocket of my jeans instead of the waistband will do that.
But he's still very bright and shiny and sleek and gorgeous - minus a few invisible screen scratches.
And he still plays Sherlock music.

And Sherlock is over, so that's really all that's on my mind right now. If you watch it and haven't see The Reichenbach Fall - go watch it. If you don't watch the series - go watch it. All of it. You won't regret it. :)

December 2013. I wonder if I can survive that long. XD

Sunday, May 20, 2012

(Diabetes Blog Week) Diabetes Hero.

The final prompt: Let’s end our week on a high note and blog about our “Diabetes Hero”. It can be anyone you’d like to recognize or admire, someone you know personally or not, someone with diabetes or maybe a Type 3. It might be a fabulous endo or CDE. It could be a d-celebrity or role-model. It could be another DOC member. It’s up to you – who is your Diabetes Hero??
Heroes are not always muscular guys in spandex and capes. Sometimes they're 945-year-old time lords, sometimes they're high-functioning sociopaths. (Sometimes they're high-functioning-sociopaths's hetero-life partners.) (Sorry.)

Okay, seriously.

When I think of diabetes heroes, I think of everybody in the DOC, everybody that isn't afraid to share their life online. The good days and the bad shared, the blog posts that show that not everybody is perfect. Especially Kerri, whose blog I look at every day for smiles and inspiration.

And then I think of everybody that reads this and supports us, even if they don't understand.

And then there's my parents. They're the ones that wake up in the night to test me, the ones that run to the drug store and buy me strips when I'm out. They're always, always there for me, even if I'm in a teenager-angsty-mood.

And then I think of my doctors, who are super cool. They seem to understand, and even if they don't, they know how to help me.

And then I think of camp. Camp. Is. Amazing. I look forward to it every day, and it's shown me that there are a lot of people who deal with this all the time, people my age who DO know what it's like.

And then I realize that everybody, EVERYBODY, is a diabetes hero. Whether they live with it or deal with it, nearly everybody knows someone. Everybody I know tries to be an advocate, and that in itself is heroism.

So thanks, everyone, for being my diabetes heroes.

And thanks so much, Karen, for organizing this week. This is the most fun I've ever had on this blog.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

(Diabetes Blog Week) Saturday Snapshots.

Alright, I was not prepared for this. Just so you know.

But anyway, here's today's prompt: Back for the third year, let’s show everyone what life with diabetes looks like! With a nod to the Diabetes 365 project, let’s grab our cameras again and share some more d-related pictures. Post as many or as few as you’d like. Feel free to blog your thoughts on or explanations of your pictures, or leave out the written words and let the pictures speak for themselves.

This is my diabetes.

Diabetes is the random bits and pieces you find on the floor of your room.

Diabetes is all the strip containers that you've collected because they are awesome replacements for the now-hard-to-find film canisters.

Diabetes is all the warm and fuzzies from camp that you can't help but smile at. Every time. (They're inside jokes. It's okay.)

 Diabetes is all the cool contraptions and boxes that you kept when you were first diagnosed because they were a little bit of 'hey, this could be cool' that helped you deal with this new life.

Diabetes is a perfectly organized drawer with all your stuff in it. (Not. I tidied it up last week so I could see what was in it. :P And yes, that is a frog.)

Diabetes is the garbage that you find on your headboard after dealing with middle-of-the-night scary things. (Lows, empty cartridge alarms, and dead batteries. Fun stuff.)

Diabetes is the shiny new Bubbles (yes, now Bubbles, because Jim was a bit creepy) that sits on your hip and (to your great pleasure) has no scratches or un-shiny patches [yet].

Diabetes is the piece of paper that you wrote every single setting down on when you switched pumps. Yes, a whole piece of paper.

 And finally [for now], diabetes is the yellow shirts (which will have smileys on them) that you get to make your whole team wear at the Diabetes Walk.

I completely forgot about this and found all these pictures in the space of ten minutes. It's amazing how the little tiny things that make up diabetes are everywhere.