Walk fundraising has begun!

I finally pulled my leaky site, and it turns out the cannula was bent. Like, BENT. In half. Not even half in my body. So I have no idea why I wasn't high all night. *throws hands in air in a major shrug/Igiveup*

Today I actually did stuff. My long-overdue JDRF Donordrive page is up, as the Walk to Cure Diabetes is coming up fairly quickly. You should go visit my page! http://jdrfca.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donordrive.participant&participantID=182405
My fundraising goal this year is at least $750, as I want to do all that I can to help JDRF in their quest for a cure. I greatly appreciate every donation, every well-wisher, everything that anyone can do. As I said in the blurb, I love each and every one of you that reads this blog - even if I don't know you - because sometimes, support is all we need.
Every penny counts here (even though we don't have pennies anymore! XD), and I appreciate all of it.

And on another note, I'm going to finish my video tonight. Or tomorrow. DEFINITELY before the week ends. If Sony music would just GET BACK TO ME, that would be nice... (You hear me, Sony music licensing? Your form said allow three to four business days. Well, I've allowed four months worth of business days. Anytime you're ready...)

A leak?

Whoops...it's been a while, hasn't it. Sorry.

Well, now that I have something to say, here we are. :)

I had a yucky run of highs yesterday - it turns out my site was [a lot] older than it should have been. I hadn't been checking all too often 'cause I was babysitting and things just tend to slip my mind. I changed my site last night to my stomach (from my leg) so that it would be more absorbent and hopefully bring my bloods down. (Blood sugar is just too long.)

So today, I promised I'd test more as I was still coming down from the wicked highs. (Woke up at 11.3, which is okay, but not good enough for me.)
My first test was an hour or so before lunch, and when the screen read 20.3 (365), I didn't believe it. I'd bolused for breakfast, fresh site, the works! XD So I washed my hands and tested again; 20.8. No.

I corrected, hopeful that it would work. 5 units. After the beeps finished (I'd been holding my site to make sure it went in), I felt something wet and I was really confused before I looked and realized that this was a leaky site. Actually leaking, as in none-of-the-insulin-went-in-it-all-stayed-on-my-skin leaky. This has never happened before.

So I changed my site and re-corrected. I was mad, especially seeing as this site was less than 12 hours old.

I'd heard of leaky sites, and thought I'd had one before, but no. THIS was a leaky site. And I hope it never happens again. I still smell like insulin. I haven't figured out why it leaked, as I have yet to pull it. It's just so beautiful...so young...

The bracelet came off...

I took my camp bracelet off last night.

I've been wearing it since the end of diabetes camp, and my original goal was to wear to the beginning of next camp (which I can't go to).

I didn't want to take it off, partly because I'm so proud of myself for wearing it for so long, but partly because somewhere in my head felt like that was the last thing connecting me to camp - a thin thread pulled to the breaking point.

But I realize now that that's ridiculous. Sure, it means that the physicalness of camp is gone, but the memories stay. Even more so now - every time I look at my bare wrist I remember a snippet of camp and I can't help but smile. I may not remember every little thing, but I do remember the important things. I remember laughing, and canoeing, and sitting on the warm grass talking. I remember feeling involved and loved and special. I remember warm fuzzies and bracelet-making and haunted houses. I remember the things that make camp CAMP, and no one can ever take that away.

I may not be able to go next year, and I may no longer have a bracelet to remember it by, but camp will always be in my heart no matter what happens.
Also, this doesn't mean that I have to get rid of the bracelet - I just have to take it off my wrist. (Especially considering how painful it is right now to even move my wrist because of all the dry skin D: ). I'll keep it safe - maybe with my warm fuzzies - and every once in a while I'll get it out and go back to those wonderful two weeks. Those two weeks that will always, ALWAYS be in my heart. <3

False information.

Let's start at the beginning of this story - I'm going to Europe this summer with Girl Guides.
It's gonna be AWESOME!

Right now we're getting into the health stuff - putting diabetes on health forms and such.
I got sent some information today from somebody wanting to know if it was correct.
I won't put it all here because it's long, but it's hilarious. I just can't even.

I won't even get into how out-of-date it is (I don't think it's officially called insulin shock anymore) - also hypo/hyperglycemia can be caused by so much more than just excess/lack of insulin.

But the thing that got me the most? 'Symptoms of diabetic coma.' It goes on to list the symptoms of really high blood sugars. Which is really funny, 'cause I don't know 'bout you, but I'm thinking the symptoms of a diabetic coma are 'lying on the ground, unconscious and unresponsive'. Pretty sure that's what a coma means.

I shouldn't find this funny, 'cause it really is serious. But I can't not. "Are you in a diabetic coma?" "I don't know, am I?"

So many lies. Be careful of what you take to be true! :)

No tears.

I went to see Les Miserables again last night. The third time was just as awesome as the first.

I still didn't cry. But last night, I figured out why.

Les Miserables is not a story of sadness. It may be about suffering and sadness, but it's not a sad story. It may seem to be a story of death, destruction and hopelessness, but it's not a sad story.

It's not about the sadness, the Miserableness. It's about friendship, love, freedom, dreams, hope. It's a story of love and hope and sacrifice, and while that may make you cry, I can't help but smile.

I JUST REALIZED that it's a story about freedom, equality and brotherhood! Those french things! WHOA!

And also, I guarantee that nowhere will you ever find a bigger Les Miserables nerd than me, and if you can prove me wrong I will lay my soul at your feet. XD

Body of Proof and Careers and Children. :)

I'm sorry - I just keep forgetting. I can also never think of anything to say.

But today, I watched the new episode of Body of Proof. Which is pretty awesome.

Here, have some flails:

Mary Mouser is a series regular now!
The diabetes storyline, although not front and center, is still there, on the sidelines. Just like the real thing. Always there, but not always visible.
There's a new cute guy!
I love this show so much!!!

Today, I had random lows all day. Including a 2.9 while I was trying to babysit four kids. 'Twas okay though. Also, four-year-olds are my new favourite. They're adorable and they love me but they're not independent enough to not need me and they're intelligent and they actually make sense when they talk. :)

And Sparks camp was this weekend. (And next weekend for the other group). It was fun, except for the fact that apparently, Sparks don't like sleeping. They were up until at least 11 (although one of them may have stayed up all night), woke up multiple times during the night, and got up at 6 or so. And EVERY time they woke up, they wanted to talk to me. Being the favourite can be hard. XD But it also means I get lots of hugs.

I love kids. I just...they're awesome. I love talking to them and being responsible for them and hanging out with them. I'm sad that there are not very many careers in working with children.

That's another thing - we've been researching careers and education in Planning, and it's kind of stressful. I don't know what I want to do with my life. I know that I want to work with children - but I don't want to teach, I want a fair amount of money, and I don't want to run a daycare. Not a lot of careers fit all that criteria. Right now I'm leaning towards Pediatric nurse (again) - and I was surprised to learn that BCIT is the only school in north america that offers a specialized pediatric nursing program. Which is pretty awesome. Also, a pediatrician can make up to 300,000 dollars a year. That's a lot. And it made me think - maybe? I don't know. I just don't know!!!

Sick.

When people try to tell someone about my diabetes, sometimes they say I'm 'sick.'
I disagree. I don't think I'm sick. I have a condition which I have to manage, but it doesn't make me sick.

But today, I am sick.
Real people sick.
I don't like it.

I can't remember the last time I felt this awful. I have no energy. At all. I've spent the last 17 hours in bed, unable to do anything.
Yesterday the only thing I ate was a small bowl of yogourt.
And then I had some glucose tablets and Fresca.
Which I promptly threw up. (And I must say, rasberry tabs and fresca make the least offensive acid I've ever tasted.)

And although my blood sugars have been steady and in a good place, I want this to be over.
The hot-cold-hot-cold has to stop.
Also, I want my energy back. Remember when I could sit up without a Herculean effort? Those were the days. XD

And my arm site, suprisingly, has stayed on for 6 days.
I should really, really change it.